Just in from the Dumbfounded Dixie Lee!

I know you's alls out there are hipsters and this be old news to the likes of yous. But we live slower up in Weedpatch. So I's gotta comment on this Kanye Kimmie offspring-naming of theirs. Those two don't got the good sense God gave to a goose. Northwest?! Most folk name a kid after a great aunt, bird, flower or famous actress. But a direction? (Imagined lame-butt conversation) “Let's get out the book of baby names sweetheart. Too late I already logged on to mapquest.”

In between re-reading the New Testament (the Old is just too much action adventure for me these days, more destruction than Guardians of The Galaxy) for the infinite time today and no, I am a nun not one of these zealots who sits at Starbucks and highlights passages and tries to recruit every passer by who just wants their half non-fat, half soy, hotter than hell 120 degrees, extra-foam pagan latte. I was led by God to this blog entry by Ham (the Creationist and head of Answers in Genesis). He prostelitizes "You see, the Bible makes it clear that Adam’s sin affected the whole universe," What?!! Oh no! Eve has enough guilt already. Now she's responsible for Klingon's original sin too! I admit The Blob was a glutton but E.T. was an angel! The only thing we can do is all pray for the alien abduction of Ken Ham. He does look rather spacey, he does. But God bless you, Mr. Ham, for more material! I've been invited to perform in the JaCqI bOwE iS nOt qUiTe hErSeLfie show in September. I think I will have to be starting a Coalition for the Equal Salvation Rights Of Alternative Life Forms.That is assuming they have souls. If not, I am sure the Catholic Church would be more than happy to sell them one.

jaCqI bOwE's nOt qUiTe hErSeLfiE (and she certainly wasn't last Friday night!!!)

The pro's of procrastination. 
1. Pro-crastinators are very positive people. "No worries. We will just do it tomorrow!" Not like the fatalists. "Seize the day, there may not be a tomorrow." Pro-crastinators protest! "There's going to be a tomorrow. That's the day I'm going to do it!"
2. Pro-crastinators are mentally and physically rugged. People that don't put things off until the last minute like taxes, bill paying and eating lunch, will never know the thrill of adrenaline and sublime sleep we get after pushing ourselves to the limit.
3. Pro-crastinators are actually very industrious. I have started more projects in one day than most people finish in a lifetime.
4. Pro-crastinators never waste their limited hours on this earth doing things they would rather not.
5. Pro-crastinators will never bore you with a long list of pro's. I will finish this tomorrow.

But I will tell you now about the super silly show last Friday night at The Actor's Group Theater in Burbank. It was less slick than the former Flapper's Comedy Club with the great technical support. But I returned to my Santa Cruz nonsense-abilities of let spontainaity run where it will. And it did and the show ran amuck and the crowd roared! The next  jaCqI bOwE's nOt qUiTe hErSeLfiE will be happening in September.

It's time to get blogging again! Either that or do my taxes so...blogging wins! I performed two stellar-ly received shows at Flappers Comedy Club in lovely downtown Burbank and am planning the next event for I am feeling indomitable (a new word that I learned today which means impossible to subdue, quite the adverb, or adjective if I said, "I am the indomitable Jacqi Bowe) Sorry, English major flashbacks. And I am becoming Los Angelesitable (unable to shut-up!)

"Very funny show....a must see. This gal is awesome! Kept me laughing all nite:)" Josephine 

“While she's not quite herself, the self she is, is not to be missed!” Howard 

Here is a write up in a Valley paper! It would have been great if I had blogged it before the show but to be honest my publicist told me about it at a Christmas party and the shows were in September and November. Hurray for Hollywood! There's no bad or outdated press, just press. So press on the link if you are feeling indomitable!

http://northhollywood.patch.com/groups/announcements/p/jacqi-bowe-to-hit-the-stage-at-flappers

Of course I am busy writing new material for the upcoming show! Sometimes a crazy life in show biz just scripts it for you!!!

The Phone Perils of Jacqi Bowe 10/16/13- What I said: "Hello, Is your activity director in?" What THEY said: "Yes." Looooooong silence. What THEY said: Nothing. Nothing at all. Very silent. (loooooooong beat) What they finally said:" Do you want to speak with her? What I really wanted to say: "No, not particularly. Just making sure they were available. I think it's important for employees to be available. After this conversation I will be available for the funny farm. I will replay this over and over in my head to try to understand why you couldn't infer that I wanted to speak with her. Okay, a little indirect for sure but I thought it was a polite way of asking for someone. Next time I will just call and say, “Give me your activity director.” No, I can't say that either, you will take it literally and say, "I just can't give her to you. Who are you? We don't just give away our employees. "Okay, I would like to speak with your activity director. "But they could just say, “That's nice. I don't know if she wants to talk with YOU. Who are you to just say what you want? Maybe she's not available. Maybe you should start by asking if she even has time for you.” What I say now: "Time for that booking agent!" But then I'll have to call and ask if they are available!

Tag PhotoAdd LocationEdit

The Reviews are In!

What the fans are saying!!

"Very funny show....a must see. This gal is awesome! Kept me laughing all nite:)"

                                - Josephine 

“Great energy, Great characters! ...loved the songs...hysterical.”

- Stacy

“Terrific!!! One of a kind.”

Dianne

“Thanks for all the laughter I will relish ...It was great

night out for me and my Mom!”

- Liz

“I loved all the characters! All so different, really funny and fun. And the spontaineity and the songs!"

- Raphael

What I was thinking...

I can't see them. It's dark, but I can hear them laughing!

Slow down! Oh my God, can they see my wig cap?! (Where are my glasses?) My beret's falling off. Who just walked in? What's the transition? 

Why can't I just hop around, subject to subject? (I know, I know...I'll make the one linear person in the audience insane.)

Transitions! I've never seen a show that left me thinking, "Wow, I loved those transitions! The performer, the content, and the music all sucked, but those transitions were brilliant!" (...and now, accepting this year's Tony Award for best transitions...) 

Oh! The show's over! They're clapping (for me?). A lot! And they're still laughing! Whew! (They're not mocking me, are they?)

What just happened? 

Thank God we taped this! (I think)

Collette Eau De Toillette

7:30 Tonight at Flappers!